The Start of Clinic

Hello World! Its me! I am back!

I have very good and exciting news, I am officially a D3 student. It feels strange to say and strange to type. It almost feels false, like I am still just a dental assistant and not the provider. My first day in clinic was this Tuesday 5/20/25. I felt an overwhelming feeling of joy and eagerness. Yet, that eagerness was overpowered by nerves. When I think about what I have accomplished I feel a sense of relief but then doubt tends to slip into my mind. Now you may ask, why doubt? I would respond with, I am not sure.

That's the entire idea of doubt right? An unwanted feeling where you subconsciously associate negativity to yourself. I know that I have worked extremely hard to get here, yet, when I walk into that clinic a part of me feels like I am still 21 and freshly graduated from college. Side note I am 25 years old. But enough about that, lets talk about something more interesting. Although I have doubt, the INFJ in me feels a sense of control as well. I am ready and I am excited to treat every patient with a smile and leave them with a sweet taste of dentistry (no pun intended).

I am currently in the school cafeteria waiting for my next class to start, and I feel very relaxed at the moment. My first week of clinic as third year has come to an end. In a few years I will be named Dr. Sena.

Although I am enjoying every bit of being here, I have realized something. I have changed so much in the two years that I have been in Detroit, and sometimes I ask myself if it was for the better or worse. Sadly enough I have to agree with the latter. I am still me, but a new version has been shown to me. I feel an uncontrollable sense of negativity and it hurts because I have always been an optimistic person. I think my surroundings have taken a toll on me. Growing up, the people around me were sad and mean and evil, yet I always knew it wasn't there fault. Now that I am here surrounded by students who want the same dream as me, the negativity I witness feels different. I have never seen the hurt or worry of the privileged. It makes me feel strange. I feel like I should mimic what I see, but that is not right. I just want to be the same person I was two years ago. Or the same person I am today. I guess that is why my favorite movie and phrase is, "Only Yesterday".